Erotic control and chastity games are paradoxical preferences. Essentially, people into these surprisingly common fetishes are turned on by the idea or practice of not reaching orgasm. If this sounds weird, confusing, or harsh, read on to learn more.
These three concepts are closely related but not synonymous. In brief, here’s what each means:
Erotic control is an umbrella term that encompasses many different forms of orgasm-based play, including denial, edging, training to orgasm on command, and chastity. Erotic denial means giving up erotica for some time. Denial can be self-imposed or imposed by a dominant partner in a power exchange relationship.
Chastity involves playing with chastity devices (such as penis cages or belts) that physically prevent genital contact and stimulation. There are chastity devices for all types of bodies, but chastity devices for people with penises are generally small and practical. Chastity devices for people with vulvas are often large and bulky and can make it difficult to go to the bathroom or shower.
Edging is getting as close as possible to erotica, but stopping before going over the edge and climaxing. If you’re interested in (or curious about) erotic control, you may or may not want to explore all of these different aspects in depth. You can try erotic control alone or with a partner. It can be something you do on an ongoing basis or just for the duration of a scene. Why? As with any fetish, people like erotic control for a variety of reasons, but the only way to know for sure is to ask.
Erotic control and chastity are often deep psychological quirks; that is, people do it for at least as many psychological as physical reasons. Many submissive find that letting their dominant partner control their arousal puts them in a more submissive state of mind (subspace), which can be a reward in itself. After all, when someone else has control over when or if you climax, your motivation to please that person is extremely high.
Dominant people often enjoy the sense of power and control that chastity and erotic control give them. One dominant said, “When someone gives me the keys to my sexual release, I see it as the ultimate act of trust and surrender.”
Of course, erotic control and chastity ideas also have physical effects. Many people say that the longer they are denied the key or the more aroused they become, the more aroused they become. This feeling of sustained and increasing sexual arousal can be very pleasurable. And of course, the eroticism ultimately becomes even more intense!
Erotic control and chastity can also be related to masochism. After a while, some people find prolonged arousal painful. For those with penises, erections can be painful due to the physical restrictions of the chastity device.
Again, people are interested in these preferences for a variety of reasons. Perhaps the more interesting question is, why are you interested in chastity or erotic control? You are interested in erotic control or chastity play and would like to get started. Take a deep breath, pause, and slow down. When trying a new kink, it’s always a good idea to move slowly and play around.
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